The quarantine hasn’t been lifted, and we have been in lockdown since March 14th. We have been inside our homes without the privilege of going out and mingling with others in public for the last forty days. I am slowly feeling the effects now of being constricted at this tiny dwelling even though I have been a work from home mom since 2010. Don’t get me wrong – I love staying at home with my children. It’s just that I am feeling the blues, and that notion in my head won’t leave: this pandemic will last for a very long time. And that scares me.
I have been blessed to be still working and earning because my boss in the United States is still in operation. He owns an online mental health counseling website, and at this time, it is a hit. People are getting more anxious and depressed by the day. They want answers, and they need solutions that the government cannot fully provide. What they want to hear is that the pandemic is controlled and that we can all go back to our normal lives soon. But can it be done? The future of reopening the business doors of all nations in the world in the near future looks bleak. People are saying, can we risk an economic meltdown against the deadly COVID-19? Our clients who seek counseling are always asking that question. Our counselors cannot provide a definite answer but do try to give comfort and ease, in a way.
My work is writing blogs and articles about mental health. I am not a mental health counselor, but I have been to workshops and seminars on various mental health topics. It has given me certifications, and I am fully equipped to talk and write about it. This is what I do from home. I write, and I do a side business as well. My side business is selling beauty products, and these products are my brand.
I have been doing that for the past ten years, and it is my bread and butter. The money I earn from writing and my beauty and cosmetics brand keep my kids and me afloat. I have two young children, Joshua and Jaden. They are twins and are seven years of age. I care for them myself and get no support from their biological father.
It doesn’t mean that I don’t have a love life. When this lockdown began, my boyfriend made sure that he would live with the boys and me. He loves them and has been in their lives since they were three. I don’t know what the future holds for Jake and me, but he has certainly proven himself to me over the years.
He notices that I am sometimes quiet but deep in thought. The nice guy that he is, he tells me to open up and say to him what is in my mind. I have been very afraid because of the pandemic. My mind is in circles – what will happen to the boys if I get sick, or if they get sick? I am that paranoid. He just hugged me tight and told me that I have to talk to my manager so I can also speak with an online mental health counselor connected with our company. Jake also reassured me that he would be there for the boys and me until the end of our lives. Actually, after he kissed me, he slipped a tiny ring in my hand and asked me to marry him.
I was shocked, surprised, but joyous at the same time. Is he for real? He was asking me to marry him while I was wearing my frumpy PJ’s, a no-shampoo and bath hair situation, and mismatched socks. His words were – “Pandemic or no pandemic, I want to be the only man who will love, protect, and support you always. Marry me.”
My answer – yes. And I also had that mental health check. The boys, too, I asked our boss if we could do a family therapy online session. It was given.
Days are hard right now but will love and support, you will feel that surviving is a necessity.